Basic Responsibilities of the Caregiver

Tips for the Caregiver | Support for Caregivers | Coping for Caregivers | Advanced Care at the End of Life

Cancer is hard on everyone.  Mesothelioma can be a particularly devastating diagnosis for both the victim and his/her family, especially given that – in most cases – mesothelioma is not diagnosed until the cancer is in its advanced stages.  Currently, there is no cure for mesothelioma though scientists and researchers are working hard to find drugs to combat the disease.  Until there is a definitive cure, the feelings of hopelessness surrounding many who develop mesothelioma make living with the diagnosis extra difficult for both the patient and his/her caregivers.

In the Beginning

When your loved one is first diagnosed with mesothelioma, he may still be able to do a number of things on his own.  Most likely, he will need emotional support more than physical support at this time. 

Some meso patients won’t want to talk about their diagnosis while others will possibly ramble on about the unfairness of the disease.  It will be your job to “be there” for your loved one, whether or not he/she wants to chat.

The mesothelioma patient may also need some basic help with other tasks such as getting to doctor’s appointments or doing light housework.  Many cancer patients want to stay as independent as possible for as long as possible.  Respect their wishes.  Allow them to do what they wish to do as long as they are able. 

As the Disease Progresses

The tasks of everyday life will begin to get more difficult as a meso sufferer’s disease progresses or as they embark upon treatment for the disease, such as surgery, chemo, or radiation.

With energy zapped by the disease or the effects of treatment, there will be days when your loved one just can’t do anything.  That means a number of tasks will fall on you, including:

• Shopping
• Planning and preparing meals
• Administering medication
• Bathing and dressing
• Helping with finances
• Getting to doctor’s appointments or treatments

Near the End

It will be difficult for both the patient and the caregiver to face the ultimate realities of a cancer such as mesothelioma.  Preparing for the end of life is a mentally draining task that will take a toll on both the patient and his loved ones.  You can help by:

• Contacting a clergyperson or other counselor to help all involved deal with end-of-life issues.
• Helping the patient be sure that wills, living wills, and other legal documents are in order.
• Talking with the patient about options for advanced care, such as hospice.  
• Seeking help for yourself if the burden gets to be too much to bear.